


Hot Chocolate

by ohclare



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shop, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-02
Updated: 2013-10-05
Packaged: 2017-11-20 02:42:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 10,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/580400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohclare/pseuds/ohclare
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mordred and Merlin always go to the same coffee shop and yet Mordred can never summon up the bravery to talk to him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Watching

**Author's Note:**

> written for the prompt 'hot chocolate' as part of the christmas 25 days of fic despite which it's not particularly christmassy - oops.
> 
> Mordred is 18 and Merlin&co are around 22/23 in case you want to know about ages.

They have coffee sometimes.

Mordred sees him across the room and wishes that he was brave enough to go over, to introduce himself but he never does. But in his mind the two of them sit there and laugh together, in his mind they have coffee together.

Sometimes he comes in with others; a pretty dark skinned girl that he spends the entire time laughing with; a striking dark haired woman who he has serious intense conversations with; a group of friendly laughing guys who make jokes loud enough for everyone to hear; or worst of all a handsome blonde man who Mordred is sure he’s in love with. Part of him says that it would be so easy to go up and introduce himself to any one of his friends, that that way he could find himself gradually closer to the man of his dreams. But he never does, he doesn’t have the bravery for that.

But the worst part is when he’s not there at all and Mordred stays way too long just in case he’s running late. He knows they’re impossible but just catching a single glimpse of him makes the day so much brighter.

It’s the beginning of November when he’s approached. The dark haired woman who has always scared him more than any of the other coffee shop regulars with her intensity doesn’t even ask before she slides into the seat opposite him.

“You’re either staring at me or at Merlin, which one?”

Mordred just stares at her for a moment, unsure of how exactly to respond. And it’s only because she continues to stare expectantly at him that he manages to choke out, “Merlin?” It’s the first time he’s heard his name and yet it fits so instantly that he feels as if he must have always known his name somehow.

The woman smiles and it transforms her face from someone terrifying to someone who seems welcoming somehow. “Excellent, because I would have felt bad telling you that little puppy dogs aren’t exactly my type. Morgana, by the way.” And with that she offers him a hand to shake.

“Mordred,” he manages to offer back with a small still worried smile as he takes her hand.

“So Mordred when are you going to talk to him? I’ve seen you staring for two months now and as adorable as it is Merlin’s too obvious to notice that sort of thing, especially as he’s still moping over my very heterosexual half-brother, so I’d suggest you making the first move. You’re what? Twenty? I’m sure you’ve at least tried hitting on guys before.”

Mordred shook his head, “I’m eighteen and no.”

If anything this seemed to make Morgana more gleeful, “oh wow you really are a puppy aren’t you? It’s not hard really, just go over and say hi next time he’s here alone okay. And if you don’t, well let’s just say you’ll regret it.” And with another scarily charming smile she just got up and left the café.

Mordred just stared at the door for a while, he wasn’t entirely certain what had just happened but he was pretty sure that somewhere along the way he’d got permission to go after the guy he’d been lusting after for months. But he didn’t wait for him to turn up that day.

He still didn’t approach him, oh he thought about it more often but he still couldn’t find the bravery to get up and go over. Each week Morgana would come by his table and make the same threats to him, she even talked him into giving her his number somehow so that she could threaten him more effectively. So sometimes as he watched Merlin and Morgana debate earnestly over their coffee he would receive a text telling him to come over, he always ignored it.

Soon enough it was December and term was almost over. Mordred wasn’t sure how he was supposed to survive over Christmas without seeing Merlin every day; three whole weeks without seeing his face seemed like a lifetime. And the texts from Morgana were getting more threatening, when she promised a proper photo if he went and talked to Merlin he thought that he might die from desperate happiness – and yet he still couldn’t go over.

He began to consider telling his parents that he couldn’t come home because he had too much work to do and yet he knew that they wouldn’t believe him. Anyway Merlin probably had somewhere else to be at Christmas too, he probably had family to go to too.

And then one day Merlin entered the café with red eyes, bundled up against the icy chill outside but the red eyes clearly weren’t from that. Mordred assumed that someone was coming, that Morgana or one of the others would follow in a few minutes ready to comfort him and yet after fifteen minutes he still sat there alone sipping blank eyed the drink clasped in his hands.

The idea of texting Morgana never somehow entered his head; instead as Merlin placed the empty mug on his table (at least Mordred assumed it was empty), he quickly ordered two drinks and headed straight for Merlin.

“Hi, is it okay if I sit here?” His heart was beating so fast that he was certain he was going to spill both drinks all over himself if he held them much longer.

Merlin just gave him a noncommittal shrug. It wasn’t until he had sat down that he actually spoke, “I’ll leave when your friend gets here.”

“Oh, no. it’s for you,” he managed to choke out as he pushed one of the mugs over to him with a nervous smile. “You looked as if you needed some hot chocolate.” He still couldn’t quite believe his own daring, that he was actually sitting directly opposite Merlin. “But if you don’t like it that’s fine, I just thought that maybe you might want some.”

Merlin looked at him in quiet surprise and confusion, “no, thanks. I like hot chocolate.”

Silence reigned for a few minutes, the only thought in Mordred’s head was blind panic now his brief moment of bravado had disappeared and been replaced with the completely surety that Merlin must think him mad.

“Merlin.”

For a moment he almost says _I know_ before he remembers and knows that that’s the wrong answer. “Mordred.”

“You’re here a lot too aren’t you?” it’s not a question he expects an answer to; it seems like more of a statement. “It’s nice to know your name rather than as the cute boy in the corner.”

The word cute roars triumphant in his chest and although he’d rather be known as hot or sexy he’s so grateful that Merlin thinks he’s cute, and a genuinely happy smile bursts out of his lips without hesitation. “I kept on meaning to say hello but you always had… friends.”

He’s grateful too that Merlin doesn’t correct him there and remind him of all the time he’d sat there alone because he has no answer he’s willing to share of why he didn’t approach him then.

They sit in silence then, Mordred careful not to stare for too long and yet completely unable not to take in all the details he’d missed while he’d stared from afar. He doesn’t mean to but it happens anyway because Merlin is so much more beautiful close up and red eyed than he could have ever imagined in all those months of waiting.

And then Merlin stands, another empty cup on the table. “It was nice to meet you Mordred,” he tells him with a weak smile, “thanks for the hot chocolate.”

He makes no promises of future conversations before he leaves and Mordred feels like crying. But when he receives a text a few hours later from Morgana, _score one for the puppy_ , he laughs and cries all at once because if he didn’t tell her that means that Merlin did, and that means hope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i may expand this into a longer series exploring their growing relationship beyond their first meeting but this depends on feedback - so yeah let me know if you'd be interested.
> 
> EDIT: this is now definitely going to be continuing because yay adorbs


	2. Beginnings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I owe you a drink"

He can’t go back to the café until two days later and even then all he feels is a pit of nervousness swirling around in his stomach. Despite Morgana’s gleeful texts he’s managed to persuade himself that he’s going to be greeting by pure dislike or at best greeted by a blank stare.

But when he arrives Merlin’s nowhere in sight. Mordred tries his hardest not to be disappointed but he can’t help it, he never imagined that he might not actually be there. Even if he there’s a chance he hates him he needs to see him right now, he needs a glimpse of his face. He manages to order though, take his usual seat and he waits. Every time he hears the door open he looks up but it’s never him, he’s not coming.

It’s dark when he leaves the café that day, and he almost sends Morgana an angry text before he chickens out.

Perhaps he’ll be there tomorrow.

Mordred’s train home is at five the next day but still he goes to the café, suitcase in hand and ready to wait. He just needs to see Merlin before he leaves; Morgana still hasn’t delivered on her promise of a picture despite all her assurances.

He’s only just joined the queue to order when someone else comes up behind him. “I owe you a drink,” they say and he turns around in surprise.

“Oh,” he sighs without even meaning to and instantly kicks himself mentally for sounding so pathetic, “I mean it’s okay, you don’t owe me anything.”

Merlin just shrugs and orders them two hot chocolates anyway. He doesn’t say a word as he leads the way to his usual seat and Mordred feels awkward there, he belongs a few tables away watching while Merlin has this exchange with some other person.

“It’s gingerbread,” he says as Mordred picks up the mug, “since it’s almost Christmas.”

“Thanks.”

They sit in silence again. It’s not awkward really and although he tries to think about how the hot chocolate tastes really good all he’s really doing is thinking about how attractive Merlin is and how nice he’s being when really he’s done nothing to deserve it. He tries not to stare.

And then Merlin puts his mug down and speaks, “tell me about yourself?” It’s not a command although out of any other mouth it would seem like one, it just makes him smile.

“What do you want to know?”

And it’s like that that Mordred tells him all about his overprotective parents who almost refused to let him leave their small rural town to come to university, how ever since he was a little boy he’d wanted to become a doctor and how his course was so much harder than he had expected. He didn’t tell him everything though, that no matter what he tried to be at the café everyday just to see him or that his sister had died of cancer or how his parents were so proud of him that it hurt to know that he could so easily disappoint them with a few words or any of the other things that hurt so much.

And then Merlin tells him things too. He tells him how he works for some PR company around the corner with his best friend Arthur (Mordred pretends he doesn’t notice the look that crosses his face each time he mentions him), how his other best friend Gwen has covered their flat with hundreds of fashion designs, how his all his friends are completely insane, how much he’s looking forward to a quiet Christmas with his mum back in Wales and how he’s really impressed by the fact he’s a medical student (he blushes here and instantly goes even redder with embarrassment when he realises).

He knows that neither of them have shared anything important really but it was nice. It was nice to see Merlin so animated right in front of his eyes, for his benefit rather than because of someone else. He almost wants to cry when he says he has to go but after such a perfect afternoon he knows that he can’t be upset with so much.

When Merlin asks for his number his heart almost breaks with happiness.

The train is pulling into the station when he gets a text from him. _I really enjoyed talking to you this afternoon. Text me when you’re back. Merlin._ He supposes a kiss at the end would have been too much to hope for, even if he is secretly disappointed.

He has to sit through a whole awkward dinner talking about university and any hypothetical girls that he might possibly like before he’s able to go upstairs and escape to the peace and quiet of his room. He almost laughs when he opens his emails to see one from Morgana containing the promised photo, he’s not sure how to be satisfied with a static image now they’ve talked and yet that’s all he’s got for the next few weeks and somehow that’s got to get him through.

He knows that it’s going to be a long holiday.


	3. A new year

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i deeply apologize for the fact that this chapter has taken me a month to write but hopefully the next will be a lot quicker.

Mordred didn’t text Merlin the moment he got back in January. He didn’t even go to the café for a week. He’s not sure why but things are different now and he’s scared of what’s going to happen.

He feels bad when he finally makes his way in, arms full of books and sees Merlin waiting there in his usual seat.

“Mordred!” he calls and he feels his heart flutter in his chest.

“I’m sorry,” he says before anything else, trying to make sure that his nervousness doesn’t show by attempting to transfer the restless energy somehow into the books in his arms. “I just… home and uni and I just…”

“It doesn’t matter. Come and tell me about your holidays.”

He doesn’t understand why Merlin doesn’t seem to care but his heart leaps up a few notches and he smiles. He doesn’t get it but he likes it anyway.

He doesn’t tell him everything but he tells him the good stuff, he tells him the funny stuff and he tries his hardest to get him to laugh because knowing that he can do that is the best feeling in the world. Merlin’s world is so different to his own, he’s an adult and yet he seems to want to make him part of his daily routine.

When Merlin says “see you tomorrow” Mordred feels as if his heart is going to break yet again.

And he does see him tomorrow, and the next day and the next and the next.

He doesn’t know how it happened but somehow he’s managed to become friends with him, he’s managed to find his way into the smallest part of his life. And yet while once he would have said that this relationship would have been so much more than he expected, now he has it he just wants more. He’s not sure whether he’ll ever be satisfied because the more he gets to know Merlin, the more he has to know about him.

He’s not sure if this is normal either, isn’t he meant to be satisfied with what he’s got? But Merlin is the first real person he’s ever liked and he doesn’t know how he’s meant to move forward. He doesn’t even know who he’s meant to ask, all his friends would just tell him to say something but somehow he knows that’s the wrong thing to do. In the end he texts Morgana.

He knew what she was going to say before he did it, he knew that she would just tell him to tell the truth but in a way that’s why he texted her because he needed someone to say it to him. But he can’t manage to bring himself to reply to a text that says _just tell him that you want to suck his cock already_ , that’s beyond his capabilities.

He’s why not surprised to see her sitting with Merlin the next day when he enters the café, if it wasn’t for the fact that Merlin called him over he would have automatically retreated to his old table but he had no real way of turning down anything he asked of him.

“This is Arthur’s sister Morgana,” Merlin offered when Mordred finally sat down next to him (Morgana had made it impossible to sit next to her and knew it from the grin she gave him). “She also went to school with Gwen and…”

“And,” she continued with a smirk, “his one and only ex-girlfriend. Tragically Merlin turned out to be gayer than a tree full of monkeys on nitrous oxide and so I turned him into a friend. However Merlin you’re a bit slow again, Mordred and me are already great friends after I spotted his puppy dog eyes staring at us months ago.”

Mordred could feel his face going very very red and resolutely stared at his mug of coffee hoping that his skin would return to its normal colour before anyone noticed. He noticed Merlin’s awkward laugh at the statement though, even if he wasn’t sure at which statement he was laughing at.

There was a pause still before Merlin spoke again, “dumped Alan yet?”

“Yawn, he’s such old news.” Mordred could practically hear her rolling her eyes, “did you see what idiot theory was being touted in Psychology Today last week?”

He couldn’t really follow the conversation that followed, full of names and words that meant nothing to him but as his cheeks cooled he manage to look up at them both and marvel at the passion in their faces. Well he was really watching Merlin. He wished that he could manage to get this sort of passion out of him but they were yet to find that thing that both of them cared enough about to react like this, mutual interests just wasn’t enough.

It’s only when he awkwardly butts into their conversation to say he’s got to head to a lecture that either of them acknowledge his presence again. He can’t help but notice that Merlin looks guilty and feels that familiar note of joy leaping in his chest again.

Morgana pulls him into a hug as he stands, “I’ll see you soon puppy or I’ll text you abuse again.”

What surprises him is the hug Merlin gives him, it’s the most physical contact they’ve ever had and it’s the feel of his body against his own that he keeps on turning over in his mind for the rest of the day rather that his facial expressions. He can’t even remember if Merlin says if he’s going to be there tomorrow or not.

Morgana’s text a few hours later simply reads _don’t forget to say thank you x_


	4. Small Steps

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i apologize for the shortness of this chapter but the next two will hopefully make up for it

“I got you a hot chocolate,” Merlin tells him as Mordred stumbles through the café door a week later. “It’s freezing out there.”

He only manages to get out “thanks,” once he unwinds the scarf covering half his face, flashing a grateful smile as he did so. It took him a little while longer still to get off all the layers he’d put on in an attempt to protect himself from the cold.

“You’re such a southerner.”

“Sorry.”

Merlin just laughed at him and gestured at him to sit down next to him. “It’s okay, that’s what I like about you.”

Mordred was quickly learning to blush a lot less, in the past week he’d heard more compliments from Merlin than ever before and being an unflattering shade bright red constantly was a lot harder than you would think.

“How was your anatomy lecture anyway?”

He didn’t need much prompting now to go into a massive rant about how horrible his lecturer was, he’d been moaning to Merlin about him on and off since they’d started having coffee together. Sometimes he feels as if that it must be really annoying to hear all these complaints about someone that he doesn’t even know but it’s always Merlin that starts the conversation, so on some level he must like hearing him rant. It’s only the sudden realisation that their legs are touching that makes him stumble and halt awkwardly in his rant.

“Sorry,” he mumbles a second later, “I think I’m talking too much again. How’s work going?”

Merlin just shrugs, “I don’t mind,” and for a moment Mordred thinks he’s going to reach out and touch his leg but all he does is pick up his mug off the table. “Work’s the same as it’s always been.”

Mordred tries not to flush as he reminds himself that they’re just friends, that Merlin just sees him a friend but it’s so hard not to hope for more. Especially when he can feel the warmth of his leg pressed against his own. “Oh, sorry.”

“It’s okay. I’m used to it.”

The hour passes far quicker than Mordred wishes it would but it’s when he realises the time and says that he needs to leave soon that Merlin shakes his head and looks nervous for the first time since he’s known him.

“It’s Gwen’s birthday next week.”

Mordred isn’t sure what he’s meant to say to that when he’s never met her and all he knows about her is from Merlin’s stories. “Okay.”

“We’re having a small party at our local for her and I mean it’d be nice if you came. I mean of course you only know Morgana but I promise all our friends are really nice, she’s definitely the scariest and if you’ve survived her well…. I mean it’s just a suggestion, it’s okay if you don’t want to.”

Mordred felt as if his face was splitting slightly from how much he was smiling. “I want to.”

“Good.” Merlin was grinning too and Mordred wasn’t sure whether he’d ever felt more ridiculous in his life but he definitely knew that he didn’t care.

It felt like forever before Mordred could pull himself away from his eyes, “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He’s suddenly very aware of how close his face is to Merlin’s as they hug goodbye and how easy it would be to kiss him. But he doesn’t of course.


	5. Arthur

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gosh i don't know what to say apart from i'm really sorry and to note that i do sincerely love all these characters and there are reasons behind what happens okay

Mordred isn’t sure why he hasn’t seen any of Merlin’s friends in the café since before Christmas (Morgana doesn’t count) and he’s kind of glad about it but when he enters the café the next day the run ends.

Sitting in Merlin’s usual spot is the handsome blonde man Mordred’s been jealous of since he first saw him, Arthur. He doesn’t know where Merlin is and all he wants to do is walk straight back out of the café and not come back until tomorrow, but he doesn’t because Merlin might just be late and he can’t miss him. So Mordred takes his old seat for the first time in a long while and tries not to stare at Arthur or the door but he’s almost finished his coffee and he’s barely done any of his reading. He doesn’t think that Arthur realises that he’s staring at him but every time he looks as if he’s about to turn his head he concentrates very hard at the words on the page in front of him even if he’s not taking them in.

When an hour has almost passed he knows that Merlin’s not coming. He just wonders why he didn’t text him to let him know.

It’s then that Arthur stands up and looks as if he’s walking towards him but Mordred reminds himself that he could just as easily be going to the bathroom. He hopes it’s just the bathroom.

Arthur isn’t going to the bathroom.

“Hey, you Mordred?”

Mordred doesn’t look up, “yes.” He’s not sure how he knows his name or what he looks like but he’s not going to ask.

“Is it okay if I sit down?”

He’s annoyingly polite and Mordred wishes that he was as rude as he always imagined him to be in his head but he forces himself to look up and smile. “Sure, who are you though?” he asks as if he doesn’t know already.

“Arthur, I’m friends with Merlin.” He has an amazing smile Mordred can’t help but think and instantly regrets it. “I’ve got a message from him actually but I wasn’t sure who you were until one of the waitresses told me.”

“Oh,” he’s almost disappointed that that mystery is so easily solved.

“He wanted to come today and talk to you in person but we decided last night that it might be better for both of you if I did it instead.” He’s still smiling and Mordred can’t help but begin to feel uneasy. “I’m sure you know that Merlin is in a very different place in life to you, he’s very successful at our work and very popular too. And while I’m sure you’re very mature for your age, you’re still a student and will be for quite a long time yet.”

Mordred could feel Arthur’s hand reach out to rest on his as his piecing blue eyes looked straight at him and was sure it was meant to be some form of comfort but he wasn’t sure why he would need comfort.

“He thought that you were just friends but yesterday he suddenly realised that you might be seeing it as something else. He only ever wanted to be friends, to help you out in a new city and he doesn’t want to hurt you.”

Mordred could feel a lump in his throat forming as Arthur spoke and resisted the urge to say that he didn’t care, that friends was more than he could have ever dreamed of but he couldn’t get the words out.

“He doesn’t want to break your heart and we thought that it might be better if you stopped being friends. He doesn’t want to lead you on more he has already.”

“He didn’t.” He managed to choke out. “I knew we were only friends.” But he knew that he was lying, he knew that he had been hoping for more than that for months, he knew that every time he saw Merlin he fantasised about kissing him and he knew that he still had that picture of him saved on his computer.

“I’m sorry,” he did sound so sorry but Mordred could still remember how much he’d always thought that Merlin was in love with Arthur and he wasn’t sure whether he could believe that he was sorry really. “I can’t understand why he doesn’t feel the same about you as you do about him.”

Mordred was distinctly aware of how Arthur was gently stroking his hand.

“You’re beautiful and I can’t see how Merlin can’t see that.”

Mordred leaned forward slightly and suddenly Arthur was kissing him. It only lasted a second but it happened, it was his first kiss.

“Sorry,” Arthur apologised instantly, “I didn’t mean to.”

“But Merlin likes you,” he couldn’t help but say and regretted how stupid he sounded a second later.

“No,” Arthur shook his head, “we’re just friends I promise.”

Mordred wasn’t sure, but he was struggling to think straight. He was still in shock and he didn’t know what was really happening anymore. “I have to go. I have a lecture.” It wasn’t for half an hour yet but he knew that he had to get out of there and the words came out before he could stop them.

Arthur just nodded and gave his hand a small squeeze, “I’m really sorry. Give me a call if you need someone to talk to.”

He scribbled his number on a piece of paper and pushed it across the table, Mordred didn’t think about not taking it.

He didn’t mean to text him a couple of hours later but when he felt like crying in the middle of his lecture he wanted someone to talk to and Arthur was the first person to come into his head. They arranged to meet at the café when Arthur finished work and it was only then that Mordred remembered Morgana but it was too late then.

Arthur was waiting for him outside and seconds later they were kissing. Mordred wasn’t sure who started it but it happened and they were kissing properly this time. Arthur pushing him against the wall as he frantically explored his mouth with his tongue, Mordred pushing back with just as much urgency as he brushed his hands through his golden hair. He could feel the bristle on his jaw itching against his skin and his strong body pressing against his slender one.

And yet all he could imagine how different it would be kissing Merlin, how his skin would be smooth and his body would be lean and how much sexier it would be than this strange kiss full of urgency and need. But Arthur was the one who liked him and Merlin didn’t. Perhaps this was how kissing was meant to be, when someone wanted you it was violent rather than soft.

He could feel Arthur’s hands resting dangerously close to his crotch when suddenly he pulled away from Mordred’s mouth and started to kiss down his neck forcing his head to turn.

It was the gasp that made him open his eyes and made Arthur pause in his hungry kisses.

Mordred didn’t expect to see Merlin, standing there with a look of hurt clear in his eyes and horror on his face.

“Wait!” he cried as Arthur leapt away from him, “Wait Merlin!”

But it was too late, Merlin had already disappeared.

“I’ve got to go,” he whispered to Arthur. All he could think of was Merlin’s face and a flood of shame filled him, he had to get away, he didn’t even wait for Arthur to say anything before he grabbed his bag and sprinted as far away from the café as fast as he could.


	6. Aftermath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> at least it wasn't a month? oops sorry

Mordred quickly learnt a new route home, one that look ten minutes longer but meant that he went nowhere near the café. He deleted every text he received from Morgana and Arthur (Merlin didn’t even try to text him thankfully). He covered his face on the streets just in case he saw any of them. He threw himself into his studies with a ferocity that he hadn’t entered into since just before his A Levels.

But still all he could think about was the look on Merlin’s face.

He deleted the photo of Merlin off his computer.

He told his parents that he was fine when they called and they didn’t question him.

But all he wanted to turn back time.

His flatmates don’t understand but they smile and offer to make rumours up about the person who broke his heart. He doesn’t have the guts to tell them that he was the one who broke the heart.

He considers getting a new phone just to stop Morgana’s texts.

The last thing he sees before he goes to sleep each night is the hurt in Merlin’s eyes.

He watches sad movies and tries not to cry into his pillow.

He watches comedies and still has to fight the urge to cry.

He starts going out with his friends to clubs and even far too much alcohol can’t numb the hurt. He tries flirting with people but he can’t do it when all he can see is Merlin’s face in front of his eyes.

He just wishes Arthur didn’t exist.

But he knows he can’t blame him totally. It was his fault too.

He’s not sure how much longer he can live with this feeling.

And then Morgana is there, waiting outside the Medical School for him with a girl he vaguely recognises.

He attempts to run the second he sees her but she’s faster than he is and a moment later he finds himself being frog marched back. Neither of them say a thing to him as they each take an arm and steer him firmly towards Starbucks. They still don’t say anything as they sit him down and Morgana goes to order them something.

“I’m Gwen,” the other woman says finally with a soft smile and Mordred wonders how he was so stupid not to realise that’s who she had to be. “I’m sorry about confronting you like that but you disappeared and we were worried.”

He didn’t say anything to that, he was expecting to be yelled at but then again Morgana wasn’t back yet.

“We’re not angry, we just want to understand.” And he almost believed her because she just looked so honest but he knew in his heart it couldn’t be true.

“Okay puppy,” the nickname seemed forced somehow as Morgana tried to smile at him while putting the drinks down, “spill.”

“There’s nothing to spill.” He didn’t look at either of them but he could feel her eyes boring into him.

“Don’t bullshit me puppy. You owe me this.”

Mordred took a deep breath and continued to stare at the table. “I met Arthur at the café because he came up to me and said that Merlin didn’t see me as anything but a friend but he was really nice and friendly and said that Merlin was an idiot for passing up on me so I arranged to meet him again and we ended up kissing but then Merlin arrived and he saw us and he was really upset so I ran away.”

“For fucks sake.” He could hear the anger in her voice and waited for the yelling.

“You know Merlin isn’t angry at you right,” Gwen said softly, “he’s angry sure but not at you. He’s more angry at himself.”

“He thinks you and Arthur are together now.” Morgana pointed out, her voice at a sharp contrast to Gwen’s.

That got Mordred’s attention though, his head shot up fast and a look of supreme confusion filled his eyes. “But… but… why?”

“Because he saw you four seconds away from sex of course, you idiot.” He could see Morgana rolling her eyes now and yet he still didn’t understand.

“Arthur told us the story from his point of view,” Gwen explained.

“Really if you were going to kiss anyone you shouldn’t have picked Arthur, he’s possibly the worst decision for a revenge snog in the world.”

“He’s very charming, I don’t blame you for falling for it.”

“That’s only because you dated him for years. Terrible taste.”

 “True, I do have terrible taste. I mean have you seen my girlfriend?”

Mordred wasn’t sure whether they were flirting or not, they seemed to be much more conscious of smirking at each other than paying attention to him. Of course when Morgana leaned into kiss Gwen he knew the answer and actually considered trying to sneak out if it wasn’t for the fact he was sure she’d chase him down the street again.

“Don’t you dare tell anyone.” Morgana announced abruptly a moment later even though she was still looking at Gwen.

Gwen just giggled before turning to look at Mordred. “You and Merlin need to talk. I don’t know if you can recover this but he was really happy on the days he saw you before and now I’m getting a little fed up of listening to Taylor Swift on constant repeat.

“This isn’t optional, you talk to him or I’ll come and bother you every single day until you do.”

He just swallowed and after a moment nodded hesitantly. “Does he know you’re talking to me?”

“No,” Morgana said matter of factly.

“He doesn’t need to know yet.”

“The truth is puppy, if he knew he’d have banned us from coming and we like him too much to see him pine away because of your stupid decisions. When I text you the details of the meeting you’re going to go and we’ll stop him from running away. Okay?”

Mordred just nodded.

“Wonderful,” she grinned at him, “now shoo so me and Gwen can have some privacy.”

He stared at them for a couple more minutes until Morgana waved a hand at him in a very obvious shooing motion and reminded him that they had finished telling him what to do. “Bye,” he murmured as he quickly grabbed his bag and coat. He hadn’t even reached the door before they forgot about him again.

He managed to make it home in some sort of daze of confusion before collapsing onto his bed. He wasn’t sure whether he was crying or laughing as he clutched his pillow close to his stomach but for once he couldn’t see Merlin’s face swimming in front of his eyes.


	7. Confrontation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy ;P

Mordred didn’t think that he’d ever been so nervous in all his life. He would put his phone down but five minutes later he’d pick it up again just in case he’d missed the text tone. It got so bad that he had to ask one his flatmates to confiscate it just so he could get some work done, but he still would get up every ten minutes to knock on their door and double check she hadn’t forgotten to tell him he’d got a text. It was only when they threatened to throw it down the toilet that he managed to stop himself.

It was probably the worst week of his life and by the time he finally got the text from Morgana he’d outlined roughly twenty different ways the meeting could go. All of them ended with him getting punched.

Mordred hadn’t intentionally picked the same clothes that he was wearing the day he spoke to Merlin for the first time, or at least that’s what he was telling himself.

If it wasn’t for the fact he had been given strict instructions to not be early on pain of death he probably would have skipped his lecture but instead he forced himself to take as long as possible picking up his things. He tried to dawdle down the street, he even tried texting as he walked but that just meant he bumped into people. Eventually he reached the pub exactly five minutes after he was told to be there.

He didn’t go in for another five minutes.

He was surprised by the number of people inside, he knew that some people went to pubs for lunch but he hadn’t really thought about it really. He’d imagined that the meeting would be somewhere with a lot less people, especially with a lot less professional looking types about. Really he’d hoped that it would be just him, Merlin and Morgana – not that he could see them.

Well not until five seconds later when Morgana appeared out of nowhere and grabbed him by the arm. “Perfect timing,” she smirked as she pulled him into a nearby booth where Merlin was waiting stern faced with a woman he’d never seen before. “This is Morgause,” she informed him, “she’s here to help stop you both from running away.”

He wondered how Morgana could sound so cheerful when she made threats but it was a talent that he was more than happy not to look at in too much detail.

“I ordered for you,” she informed him, “now sit down and open your mouth.”

“Hi,” he choked out, looking firmly at Morgause.

“No,” she pointed out with an elbow to his ribs, “Merlin, even if he’s being as uncommunicative as Morgause for once.”

“Hi,” he repeated himself, this time looking firmly at Merlin’s chin.

Merlin just nodded.

“I know I don’t deserve this meeting. But thank you.”

He didn’t nod that time.

“I’m so sorry, I’m so so sorry and I don’t know why it happened but it shouldn’t have happened.”

“You don’t need to be sorry,” Merlin’s voice sounded hollow and empty but at least he was speaking.

“I do.”

“No.”

“I never wanted to hurt anyone; I just miss you so much.”

Merlin didn’t speak again and Mordred forced himself to look up at his face. It wasn’t a face he knew.

“It’s all my fault.” Mordred could practically feel Morgana’s eyes glaring at him, he could feel the side of his head burning but he refused to look at her. He didn’t know what to say, he didn’t know how to make this better. “Please hate me.”

He was sure there were worse times for a waiter to appear with food but right now Mordred couldn’t think of a single one as he watched it silently be placed in front of them and Merlin determinedly stare at it instead of him.

He forced himself to eat a couple of chips off the plate in front of him before he spoke again. “Please say something; if only to tell me you hate me.”

Merlin waited, he put a mouthful of food in his mouth and chewed and then he finally spoke. “I don’t hate you. I couldn’t hate you.”

Mordred wasn’t sure if this was a good or a bad thing. “Please hate me,” he repeated himself without thinking. “I can’t be the only person who hates me for what happened.”

“Why would you do that?”

“Because I was stupid and thought that you didn’t like me and I just wanted to be wanted. Not that that’s any excuse.”

He could feel the sudden pressure of Merlin’s hand on his, the warmth and he willed himself not to look down.

“There’s nothing wrong with being wanted. Everyone wants to be wanted.”

“But I wanted you.” Mordred didn’t want to cry.

“I’m sorry,” and for a brief second Merlin’s eyes met his. “I’m sorry.”

Mordred pulled his hand away; he didn’t deserve the comfort of his hand on his. “What do you have to be sorry for?”

“I should have been honest, I shouldn’t have been scared. I let Arthur lie to you.”

“What do you mean?”

His eyes stared right into his, “I made Arthur go and meet you, I told him to tell you that I wasn’t interested because I was scared.”

“You told him to?”

“Not to kiss you,” he hurried to add, “never that. But I thought it would be better to break my heart sooner rather than later because you deserve so much more than me.”

“What do you mean? You’re the one that’s way out of my league.”

“But you’re you. You’re going to be a doctor…”

“And you’re the handsomest man I’ve ever met. And the funniest, and the nicest and I’m just some loser from Wales.” Mordred wasn’t sure how Merlin could believe what he was saying, didn’t he realise how much he admired and lusted after him.

He saw Merlin reach out towards him and a second later they were kissing.


	8. Hands

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm officially putting an end date on this story since i've worked exactly where things are going to happen and how long it should take so it should be all wrapped up by easter! 
> 
> and feel free to keep yelling at me about writing, your comments are EXCELLENT motivators

Morgana and Morgause had disappeared Mordred realised as they pulled apart, he wasn’t sure where they had gone (or even when they’d gone) but he didn’t care. He just knew that he was grinning the stupidest grin he’d ever grinned in his whole life.

He didn’t realize until Merlin started speaking that he didn’t look anywhere near as happy, “sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“But I wanted you to; I really really wanted you to.”

“You’re eighteen,” he groaned. “I’m corrupting you.”

There was only one thing for it; Mordred leant across the table and kissed him again. He didn’t care that Merlin was older than him, he didn’t care that he was much more experienced than him, he didn’t care that people were probably staring, he didn’t care that Morgana would make snarky comments at him and he didn’t care about anything that wasn’t directly relating to his ability to kiss Merlin right now. (That was why he did care a little about the fact that the table was rather uncomfortable against his stomach.) But most of all he cared about how perfect this kiss felt, how it seemed so natural to have Merlin’s tongue flickering in and out of his mouth, how smooth his skin was under his fingers and how amazing it felt to have Merlin’s hands knotted in his hair.

But then Merlin stopped again, pulled away slightly so that he could feel his breath against his lips but couldn’t quite kiss him. “We should finish our lunch,” he whispered, and then he let go of Mordred’s hair.

He could feel himself shaking as returned to his chips, could feel every ounce of anticipation rush through him, and he was so conscious of Merlin being only a few inches away. He struggled to eat; instead he watched Merlin desperate to reach out and touch him again but far too scared to do so. The sudden confidence after their first kiss had been replaced by some sort of terror that he hadn’t liked it, that he was a terrible kisser, that all sorts of bad things were going to happen. Even the small smile on Merlin’s face was doing nothing to reassure him. The only thing that was reassuring him at all was the fact that their feet were slightly touching and that wasn’t doing much apart from stopping him from running away.

Merlin had almost finished eating when Mordred forced himself to go to the bathroom; he knew that he had to stop staring at him and he knew he had to calm down.

He told himself to take several deep breaths, to press his hands against the wall and breathe deeply a few more times.  He knew he had to stop panicking before he went back out there and talked to Merlin, because they had to talk, they would talk. Gradually he could feel his heartbeat slowing even if his mind was still frantic and he couldn’t help but know he’d be just as panicked again as soon as he saw Merlin’s face.

What he didn’t expect was for Merlin to come in just as he was about to go back out and start kissing him without a second’s hesitation.

If their first kiss was about surprise and their second kiss about confirmation then this kiss was all about passion.

He didn’t have time to worry about whether he was doing it right; all he could do was think about Merlin. Because Merlin was right there and he wanted him so badly that all Mordred could do was struggle to keep up.

He let him push him towards the sinks, to frantically kiss him as their bodies collided and pushed against each other. He didn’t care about the pressure against the bottom of his back as he tried to stay put. He could feel Merlin’s hands find their way under his shirt, their coldness caressing his skin as his fingers rubbed circles into his sides. A moment later he let himself follow suit and suddenly his body was at his fingertips and he just pulled him closer as he held tight to his hips.

He could feel the pressure of their crotches against each other, he could feel how badly he needed this right now, and he knew how badly he wanted this. He knew how easy it would be for one of them to slip their hands down an inch or so but Merlin seemed intent on kissing him until he was breathless.

“Merlin,” he heard himself moan softly as they broke apart for a second, “please.”

And he felt him deepen the circles he was massaging into his skin, he felt his body push itself even closer to him and Mordred wasn’t sure how much more he would be able to physically take of this.

Then they both heard the door open.

They didn’t move, frozen in place as they watched the man walk in. He didn’t comment, he didn’t say a word but the look on his face as he saw them said everything.

They both moved then. They moved away from each other and tried to readjust themselves so they looked normal, so that they just looked as if they’d been to the toilets for a normal reason. Mordred wasn’t entirely sure they did, especially when he knew he kept on glancing over at Merlin every few seconds.

As they walked back to the table it felt as if everyone was staring at them, like they were the centre of everyone’s attention. And then when they got there Morgana was waiting for them with a massive smug grin on her face.

“So how was the sex?”

Mordred turned bright red and he couldn’t help but notice that Merlin too had gone slightly pink. But neither of them said a thing.

“Did I not say it loud enough? Was our little puppy any good at sucking cock?”

Merlin glared at her then, “we didn’t.”

She just raised one very well groomed eyebrow, “you both have sex hair and puppy you should tuck your shirt in properly in future.”

Mordred blushed again as he quickly corrected that, but he’d been so certain he’d done it properly.

“We didn’t have sex,” Merlin hissed.

“Sure you didn’t. Come on, we need to get back to the office. I’ve paid already.”

If people hadn’t been staring before he was sure they were staring now as the three of them walked far too slowly for his liking out of the pub.

“I’ll text you,” Merlin told him outside with a small smile and a squeeze of his hand.

And with that they were both gone. Mordred guessed another kiss would have been far far far too much to hope for. But really he was on cloud nine.


	9. Flirtation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this has been a ridiculously long time coming and i feel terrible, especially since 90% of it has been written for months. so if anyone is still interested in this little story it is now actually complete and i'll put the last two chapters up within the next week.  
> but enjoy the shameless fluff

Merlin texted him.

He texted him a lot.

Mordred wasn’t entirely certain whether he was any good at text flirting but he was giving it a good go and Merlin didn’t seem entirely repulsed. The only real problem was that he couldn’t stop grinning like an idiot every time his phone buzzed, and apparently his flat mates thought that gave them the right to tease him massively. And really he cared a lot more about the fact that he was actually getting to text him all the time and for it to seem so beautifully normal.

He just had to remind himself not to get upset about the fact that he never got to actually see him, he just had to wait for Merlin to suggest a place and that was definitely going to happen very soon he was sure. Of course he could suggest meeting up himself but he couldn’t bring himself to do that, he wasn’t brave enough to risk getting shot down.

Morgana was the one to ask him to his birthday party, to say that she knew it would mean a lot to him if Mordred was there. And he couldn’t believe it was true but he accepted anyway, knowing that a surprise party meant Merlin couldn’t object in advance and surely he’d be too nice to reject him in front of everyone.

Of course the thing about surprise parties that he’d forgotten meant that he was going to be thrust into a room of people he didn’t know. And Mordred only remembered that as he knocked on Morgana’s door to be greeted by a complete stranger.

“You must be the famous Mordred,” she beamed at him before he could run away, “I’m Freya.” She didn’t even let him open his mouth before she pulled him into the flat by his arm. “We’ve all been dying to meet you by the way.”

It didn’t take long for him to realise that that was most certainly true. Almost as soon as Freya announced that he was Mordred a massive group of guys descended on him and started shaking his hand and asking him a million questions. It was probably the first time that he’d ever wanted Morgana to appear out of the ether and start abusing him.

However help did come in the form of a voice calling out, “positions everyone!” and with final grins and winks the group of guys disappeared almost as fast as they’d arrived.

“You can hide with me,” one of them grinned at him, “we can get nice and cosy.” He wasn’t quite sure how to say no so that’s how he found himself crouched behind a sofa with someone he didn’t even know the name of – however he was starting to think that all of Merlin’s friends were massive flirts.

It turned out that leaping out from behind a sofa wasn’t quite as easy as it seemed on TV so by the time he awkwardly emerged everyone had already yelled surprise and Merlin was already glaring daggers at Morgana. He wasn’t sure whether to be upset or not that he hadn’t even seemed to notice his presence yet.

And when Merlin didn’t say a thing as he stormed through the living room Mordred couldn’t help but feel devastated. Surely he must have at least noticed him, there weren’t that many people here surely?

“You have a great butt by the way,” the guy from the sofa commented the second Merlin left the room, “excellent view.”

He didn’t even blush he was so distracted, he just wasn’t quite sure how to respond. So he just stared blankly for a few seconds before Morgana appeared and wrapped an arm around the man. “He really does doesn’t he. Sure he’s far too young for me but he does have an excellent bum.”

“Didn’t you date a nineteen year old last year?”

“Oh but darling he did have a massive cock so really you can’t blame me for that.” She winked at that and Mordred felt his usual sense of unease return. “Anyway as much fun as flirting with you is Gwaine darling I’m saving the puppy from your shameless lechery, he has a terrible record with being left alone with charming men.”

He felt as if he ought to protest that but really he doesn’t have a chance to with her quickly pulling him along after her. And really what other sort of reputation does he deserve.

“Now go make friends, I’m not going to be your sole companion every time Merlin brings you to a group event.” She instructed him with a grin and a shove in the direction on the nearest person.

Mordred just nodded (even if he was feeling doubtful that Merlin would ever invite him as date anywhere) and wondered whether it was worth actually using his vocal cords today when everyone just seemed intent on talking at him rather than to him.

Merlin didn’t say a word to him when he finally reappeared but he did smile at him and he couldn’t help but wonder exactly what was going on here. He knew that he had no right to expect anything and yet he had thought that he’d at least talk to him a little bit. He just tried to content himself with at least the smile seemed genuine.

It was probably over an hour later when he was listening to Elena and Freya obsessively discussing the merits of their local MP (who he’d known nothing about before fifteen minutes earlier) that Merlin finally came over and sat next to him.

“Hi,” he said as he awkwardly smiled at Mordred.

“Hi,” Mordred replied back with a grin that he knew looked pathetic but he couldn’t help himself.

They sat in near silence for a while, hands almost touching and feet side by side as Merlin smiled and Mordred grinned like an idiot. He knew that the girls were still talking but he was just so hyper aware of Merlin next to him that he couldn’t concentrate on anything but him.

He could feel his breath on his neck as he slowly lent towards him and whispered in his ear, “come with me.”

Mordred couldn’t say no to that.

Merlin took his hand and pulled him through the crowd as he felt his face flush red as he heard wolf whistles and laughter from them but really it didn’t matter when he could feel that warm hand in his.

They ended up on a tiny balcony attached to Morgana’s bedroom where there was only just enough room for the two of them (and he was sure he’d heard her call out a warning for them not to have sex on her bed). They couldn’t even face each other, but instead looked out over the dark city in front of them.

Merlin spoke first, “I have to tell you something.” They were still holding hands but there was a suddenly feeling of nervousness filling the air. And when Mordred couldn’t force himself to speak Merlin continued. “I should have told you before and that’s why I never suggested meeting up for coffee, I was too scared.”

“It’s okay,” Mordred whispered, “it’s okay for you to not want to date me.”

“No! No, that’s not it at all.” He took a deep breath then, “it’s about Arthur, you need to know about Arthur. We’ve been friends for a long time and I fell in love with him since we were teenagers even if he didn’t know that. He was one of the first people I came out to even if I knew he was straight. The day before you first spoke to me we both got very drunk and I told him how I felt, he rejected me.” Merlin gripped his hand tight then, “you coming up to me was the best thing that could have possibly happened.”

Mordred didn’t want to know this. He’d known about Merlin’s feelings for Arthur subconsciously but it didn’t want to have it confirmed, it just made him feel a million times worse.

“But Morgana made us talk it out and we were fine, probably better really. It actually made me realise that I didn’t love Arthur anymore; it was just a crush I’d clung to because I knew he was unavailable. That’s why I told him to tell you that I wasn’t interested, because I wanted to sabotage myself again.”

Mordred wasn’t sure whether it was the alcohol people had been supplying him with all night or the inability to listen to this anymore that made him kiss Merlin then. To act on his urges rather than his fears for once.

There was no room really; they had to stand with necks at awkward angles as they tried to hold each other. And neither of them could be satisfied as they pulled apart.

“You don’t care,” Merlin whispered.

“I just want you,” he whispered back. He still had questions of course, mainly about the fact that Arthur had been very not straight when the two of them had been kissing but he didn’t want to talk about that with Merlin, not when he wanted to kiss the right guy some more.

They didn’t make it through the bedroom without kissing some more, this time properly as Merlin pushed him onto the bed and kissed him thoroughly as they pressed against each other. They both knew what it would look like but they couldn’t bring themselves to care and there was too much glee in Merlin’s eyes as he purposely messed up Morgana’s sheets some more.

They left the room hands firmly clasped and stupid grins on both their faces even if far too many of Merlin’s friends decided to wolf whistle again. And Mordred did not care a bit.


	10. Loose Ends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's a short chapter but Arthur is back!?

Dating Merlin was probably the best thing in the world. Actually, kissing Merlin was the best thing in the world with the dating itself being a close second. They were taking it slow and Mordred couldn’t help but feel as if it went any faster he’d struggle to deal with all the joy.

The only real problem was that he was in the middle of his exams and that meant he spent 90% of his time at the library where Merlin couldn’t actually get into. Although he probably wouldn’t have gone at all if it wasn’t for the fact that Merlin made him, and would only see him if he’d done enough revision. It was the most work he’d done all year because instead of being distracted constantly he was being forced to work by the previous distracting force.

And then almost as soon as his exams were over Mordred was losing his flat. Morgana had offered to let him stay on her sofa all summer but he couldn’t take her up on that however much he wanted to. His parents were expecting him home and he couldn’t face the questions they would ask if he told them he wanted to stay, he wasn’t ready to tell them about Merlin and he couldn’t lie to them either.

But the very start of summer was heavenly, while Merlin was at work he spent time with his uni friends but as soon as he finished Mordred would be straight there. They would spend evenings in the park or at the theatre or at the pub or more often than not just at Merlin’s flat curled up in front of the TV. It was perfect.

And then two days before his parents were due to arrive he bumped into Arthur. He had just gone into town to grab a few things when he came face to face with a very familiar blond haired man. He knew that Merlin was friends with him again but that was as far as it had gone, he hadn’t wanted to know anything else.

“Can we talk?” he was surprised to hear Arthur ask, “there’s a place around the corner.”

Mordred took a moment to nod; perhaps this could be a good idea however terrified he felt. Even though he didn’t mind Arthur choosing the place he picked a table right next to the window and didn’t argue when he offered to get his coffee for him.

By the time Arthur eventually sat down opposite him he felt braver.

“I want to apologise Mordred, I lied to you and used you to make myself feel better. I should have known better.”

Somehow Mordred hadn’t been expecting that. “Umm, it was my fault too. I mean I kissed you back.” He could feel his cheeks flushing as he stared at his coffee.

“No, I don’t want you to feel like it’s your fault. Everyone else rightly puts the blame on me so please do it too. I was just being selfish because well, because of some private stuff.”

Mordred just nodded, he’d never put the blame on Arthur but it hadn’t been much good telling anyone else that so there seemed little point saying it again even if it was the other person involved.

Arthur seemed to let out a small sigh then, “I’m still sorting myself out but I’d like it if one day we were friends. But it’s okay if you don’t want that.”

There was a pause then, a pause neither of them moved to fill.

“One day maybe,” Mordred eventually replied, “you’re friends with Merlin after all.” But he didn’t add the unspoken words that he just wasn’t ready for that yet even if he was sure Arthur knew that.

They sit in silence for a little while longer as they sip their drinks and Mordred thinks that if he can get through this conversation then he’ll able to deal with spending a small amount of time together when there are plenty of other people around. He thinks he can deal with that guilt. And when he says, “see you around,” as he leaves he knows that it’s probably going to be true.

Merlin seems happy when he tells him this later, when he says with a small faint laugh that he doesn’t get why he was ever tempted to kiss Arthur and Merlin agrees with a similar laugh. It’s awkward still, this strange relationship they each have with Arthur but Mordred thinks that having each other is so much more important and he hopes every day that Merlin agrees.

And it’s later that night that Mordred whispers half asleep, “I love you,” for the first time and Merlin kisses him softly on the forehead as a small smile plays around his lips.


	11. Epilogue

Merlin is holding a sign up for him at the train station, a sign that is so ridiculously large that Mordred cannot help but turn bright red but he knows that if it wasn’t for the fact he had a massive suitcase to drag behind him he’d be running right now.

He can barely the handle before he feels Merlin’s hands on his face as he pulls him into the longest awaited kiss in the history of kisses. It doesn’t matter that they’re in the middle of a crowded railway station when they’ve missed each other so much.

The last three months have been the longest three months of Mordred’s life. Even the fact that he spent almost all his time texting Merlin or phoning him wasn’t enough; nothing is quite the same as having an actual real life physical person right in front of him.

 “I missed you so much,” Mordred says as they pull apart slowly.

Merlin just grins and kisses him again in a way that makes him wish that there weren’t in the middle of a very public area. “I love you.”

Merlin drives him to his new place, the house he’s sharing with his uni friends but that is only five minutes walk away from Merlin’s, and the two of them don’t get out of the car for ten minutes because they cannot bring themselves to stop kissing now they’ve started again.

It’s as they stand slightly breathless on the pavement that Mordred smiles with reddening cheeks and suggests that maybe Merlin should come in and have a mug of hot chocolate or something since his housemates aren’t moving in until tomorrow.

They barely make inside before they start pulling clothes off each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's the end! :(
> 
> i really hope you guys enjoyed this little story, i had a lot of fun writing it and although i know there's some loose ends still i'd have had to set the epilogue about ten years after chapter ten instead of three months if they were all going to be sorted. suffice to say merlin and mordred live happily every after okay


End file.
